Hold 'Em Gal

My sister is a cute little bespectacled thing,
The epitome of siblinguous virtue.
Even in brotherly jest, if you erred,
Be assured, she would never hurtchyou .

She's the kind of girl who would give you hotels
When your Monopoly fortunes pale,
And lend you two hundred dollars, or more
So that you can get out of jail.

But one day last week, at the home of a friend
She was gone like a summer breeze.
In place of my sister, meek and mild,
There stood Mephistopheles.

Bring out the deck, the chips and the beer,
We're here to play Texas Hold 'Em,
Deuces are wild, the meek, no more mild,
And be sure she'll never fold 'em.

She'll run you aground with her poker straight face,
And gather your chips with a smile,
And when I'm being beat my own little sis,
Her vileness looks all the more vile.

She loves her poker as flies love food
As filings adore a magnet
As fasting piranhas love immersed fleshy ankles
As mosquitoes love water stagnant

She brings a grim sternness to a Saturday night,
To a game you thought was informal.
But don't be afraid, for after she's done,
My sister returns to normal.